Iraq: Civil War Accomplished

In the movie that we’re currently in, Mr. Bush plays the straight-talking Texas Christian whose theme is “Bring ‘em on.” Powell plays the moderate team player who never covered up My Lai. Rummy plays Hitler. Cheney plays Hide and Seek. One of the great things about this movie is that you don’t have to watch ads before it – it has the advertising right in it.

The Saddamites were threatening to deploy these WMDs on the thin pretext that we were about to attack them. 69 percent of Americans believe that Hussein probably had a part in attacking the United States. Therefore it’s fine for Cheney to repeat it. After all, he repeated it first.  And W can speak with authority on Saddam having those weapons. His father gave them to him. It’s just basic Bowling for Dollars. The father sets up the pins for the son to knock down.

We’ll be establishing a democracy there, soon as we’ve sold off everything worth voting about.

It’s true we used epidemic and famine to induce a rebellion that never happened. But it might have. The U.S. government—by which I mean Halliburton—has its eye on the ball. Which reminds me, what’s the score? Never mind. I hate it when somebody scores and I don’t.

We’re going to hunt down all of Saddam’s top supporters who supported him through all his atrocities. Unless they’re in the White House. We already know where the White House is.

The reasons for the two Gulf wars were very, very different. The first one, we had to go in because of the S&L scandals. Now, there’s no scandal. Unless you count the economy. Enron. Halliburton, Harkin. Also the effort to someday get W elected President.

Marginal sectors of U.S. society have opposed the Iraq rescue. People like the army, George Bush senior and other nonentities.

At the time we thought that Saddam might attack us. He did not, goddamn him. So we had to straighten that out. we thought sure he would attack us after we bombed. He did not. This was a clear provocation.

We’re making 180 raids a week, making approximately 1000 new enemies to replace Saddam.

Saddam had links to al Qaeda: WMD program-related activity preparation committee planning sessions are known to have been contemplated.

You’re either with Bechtel, or you’re with the UN.

Now, the Export-Import Bank didn’t want to sell weapons to Saddam, on principle. A very lofty principle, which was that they might not get paid. But this attitude was overruled by a mid-level official of the United States—a Vice President, actually. A Herbert Walker something.

Bechtel has a $680 million deal to rebuild Iraq.  With closed bidding, or no bidding, contracts to United States corporations instead of to the UN.  Which goes to show what I’ve always said:  you’re either with Bechtel, or you’re with the UN.

They say we’re going in there to get resources, to pillage and rape. No. As Bush Daddy said, we’re going to go in hard, do our business, and pull out.

We were very close to finding al Qaeda in Iraq. We were only off by one letter. They’re in Iran.  Of course the Wahhabi’s and the Shia hate each other. That makes it a perfect hiding place.

Support the troops now, not when they come home.

Some have questioned the toppling of the Saddam statue, saying it may have been stage managed. Well, look, all the world’s a stage, and where there’s a stage, we must act. It’s not important that we act well, but we must act. This tear-down was exactly like the tear-down of the Berlin Wall. We just shot this one more as a closeup, to show the crowd off to best .No, it wasn’t stage-managed. It was choreographed. It was rehearsed. It was well-cast. But not stage-managed. And the press rose to the occasion, of course. Got right up there where they needed to be to get the right picture of the whole crowd. It was very exciting for them.

We are called upon to defend the hope of all mankind. But we’d rather bomb Iraq.

Polls show that 54% of Americans think we should never have gone in, but 57% think it’s going well.

We need to support our troops. Not when they come back, of course. Even if there is such a thing as Gulf War Syndrome, there’s certainly no evidence of any Gulf War II syndrome.

Iraq is not Arabic for Vietnam.  
However, Iran is Farsi for Cambodia.

Some have demonstrated against patriotism, in good numbers. Many tens of people.  There were even 200 in Vegas—what are the odds?

We lost over 100 personnel; we casualized them all by ourselves. Saddam tried to get them, but we got there first.  Some were collateral of unplanned air-earth interfaces.

$325 billion to the military, nothing for housing or education—so what? You can get those in the military.

Some of you Arabic and Vietnamese language scholars have claimed that Iraq is Arabic for Vietnam. T’aint so. However, Iran is Farsi for Cambodia. I have this info from a high official who declined to state what he was high on.

The terrorist insurgents are trying to thwart democracy, or anyway, us. The Iraqi people will have freedom, and independence from foreign domination by—well, something will pop into my head.

Meanwhile we pursue our policy of no child left behind. The army will take anyone now. Better to have our homicidal 43 year old’s over there than here, am I right?